A LOT going on in my life. For the past few years, for various reasons and through many avenues, I have been focused on finding someone "compatible" with me. I haven't felt as if I "needed" someone for many years. And then, suddenly, when I got happy, I realized it would be nice to share this crazy-ass ride with another person and that it was something I desired. It was actually quite surprising because I really am happy being free & single and I do not feel as if anything is "missing" in my life.
So WHY, when what I ask for actually comes along, (and there's a downright freaky level of comfort with the entire thing), do I still have the slightest urge NOT to trust it???? Again, I hate it that this part of me still exists! I haven't had to fight with negative voices in my subconscious for a very long time! I'm much stronger now, much more conscious now, of where those thoughts eminate from, and I'm much better at telling myself to "SHUT THE FUCK UP"!!!
So, I'm finally catching up on some TV - a much lower priority in my life now than in the recent past. Watching this week's episode of Flash Forward (awesome show, awesome premise!). Japanese symbol comes up (God, I love my symbols!): it means, simply, "Believe".
So, my pain-in-the-ass-overthinking brain wants to know if it's my subconscious 'attracting' these "messages" - but then I, once again, tell myself to "SHUT THE FUCK UP" and say aloud,"does it really matter??"